While I'm not a big fan of stereotypes, I do think there is a bit to be said for personality typing using a test like the Myers-Briggs test. Because, most of the time, it is right, no matter how you hate it. It also makes you think critically about yourself and who you are and think you are. In my case, this is a good thing.
This morning in Anatomy and Physiology, Dr. Harms, our professor, announced the specifics of the extra credit opportunity he had promised on Wednesday. The school of Science's Symposium was today, so to get 10 points of extra credit, we had to sit through two talks (and write brief notes) and could visit up to six posters (again with the notes). Since I'm hoping to get an A in A&P, I decided, why not? I ate lunch quickly, played a bit of piano, and then hurried over to the science building.
The "lectures" were okay. I sat through them though, and got the information I needed. 40 minutes and 2 sections of notes, finished. Then I went down the hall to where the nursing students were standing by their posters with the summary of their research.
Many of the posters had extremely interesting material, including one with lots of supporting research towards using controlled hypothermia to help healing of patients after heart attacks. It was also really neat to see my A&P traverse the room with his 9-month-old daughter in his arms. She waved a pen in the air (apparently her daddy doesn't let her have them that often, hehe), showed off her two little teeth, and obliged me with some cute noises. ^_^ (I just about asked if I could hold her, but I had my notebook in hand and figured that she might not take too well to me holding her when both of her parents were in sight.) And Dr. Harms carried little Marian off to listen to another group explain their findings, and I was off to finish up my notes.
Finally, I finished what I needed to do and went upstairs to the thankfully quiet biology lounge. I wanted to work on a paper due Tuesday, but the battery on my laptop was nearly dead. Also, in the quiet, I realized just how tired I was. I curled up on one of the couches and took a 30 minute nap before realizing that my dorm was not all that far away, with a much comfier bed.
As I tiredly walked back to my room, I, being the analytical nursing student I am, thought about reasons why I was so tired. After all, two and a half weeks ago, the reason for my exhaustion was due to iron-deficient anemia. I came up with three theories. I could be tired from (1) sitting through 40 minutes of lecture about pancreatic cells and receptors and hormones involved with cancer (2) taking notes standing up in a warm room, or (3) standing taking notes in a warm room with a crowd.
I think it was the crowd.
Yes, my dear readers, I am an introvert, in case you did not know. I got back to my dorm room to find three of me and Brittney's pseudo-roommates (girls who pretty much live in our room except when sleeping) and really wanted to just send everyone away. I was zapped.
Once I got a bit of my energy back (notice I did not say that I was completely rested... that's not going to happen until I sleep in a dark room for eight hours and then spend time reading my Bible), I talked with my roommate and pseudo-roommates about personality types. I read Brittney the blurb about hers from Wikipedia and Keirsey, and she was blown away. It described her almost to a dime. Then I read the other girls' blurbs, and then Brittney's boyfriend's, and then, lastly, mine.
The best part was when I found, on this other site, what kinds of things you should expect from roommates of certain types. I checked it out. Of course, Brittney's was right on. And mine? Hehe.
"'Counselors' can become very close to their roommates, but they also
need some private time and space. If the roommate bonding is negative, Counselors usually
retreat to their own space and remain somewhat aloof."
I just about died laughing. Why? Because when we were having roommate issues, I would often retreat to my bed. My bunk bed. I was literally aloof. Heh heh. And, of course, Brittney affirmed that was spot-on with me.
So, you may be wondering, why is Sarah spending so much time talking about her being an introvert? Well.... because it's 12:15am at the moment, and I'm weary from the events of today (I'm an introvert, remember, and I spent an hour in a small classroom with a LOT of people), and I have to stay up for another forty-five minutes until I go back to work. That, and...
Even though there are plenty of personality types, everyone is different. I'm different from you, as you are different from someone else. I'm so glad we're different, because life is so much more interesting this way. It makes it a joy to get to know someone different than you.
And God uses our uniqueness just the way we are.
My devotional book, several weeks ago, had a fantastic poem that I wrote down because I liked it so much. (At the moment, I'm having trouble finding the journal I wrote it in. Ahh, being a writer... Needless to say, I'm very thankful I didn't pack my journals yet.) From Streams in the Desert, on January 7, 2012:
"Others may do a greater work,
But you have your part to do;
And no one in all God's family
Can do it as well as you."
^_^ "You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You are made for so much more than all of this. You're beautiful. You are treasured, you are sacred, you are HIS. So you are beautiful." - MercyMe
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Blessed Singlehood
So I had an idea to draft this blog post back in September, but for whatever reason, the post did not get off the ground until today. Why today? Well, in part to a couple of reasons, some personal things that I cannot talk about on this blog, and today's chapel speaker. This semester, Bruxy Cavey, the teaching pastor at The Meeting House in Canada, has visited a few times for chapel both common chapels, alternate chapels, and freshmen elective chapels. Oh, er, I mean first year elective chapels. Anyway, he's a pretty neat speaker - very different from most of the other speakers I have heard at chapel, not to mention pretty different from most pastors I know. He's not afraid to talk about stuff that many Christians would not. Which is weird but cool.
On to the content. One of the last things he talked about in the chapel today was how marriage and singlehood are GIFTS. As a single, college-aged Christian girl, I admit that it is difficult sometimes to walk around campus, when the cherry trees are in bloom, waving their wispy pink branches all around and causing a flower-storm, and see the various couples walking hand-in-hand. One of my close friends just started dating a guy she's known for a couple months, and it's cute to see them together (all the time...) and hold hands. Add to that the infamous "Ring by Spring!" mantra that is repeated time and time again (jokingly, of course), and sometimes there is a little longing for someone of the opposite gender to come alongside you in your life journey.
That's not altogether a bad thing. God made us, as humans, to desire relationships, and to desire relationships with the opposite sex. Genesis 1:26-28 acknowledges this. We are made male and female in God's image. We can learn something from each other. And together, we reflect the image of God. Other things go along with that, like marriage and increasing in number, but we are made to be in relationship. The problem is when you make an idol of it.
When I was little, I spent an infinite amount of hours playing with my Duplos, Poly Pockets, Barbies (don't judge me - you know you played with them too, even if it was just popping their heads off), and who knows what else, pretending that I was the girl and that I was married and having children. Don't believe me, ask my sister. When I started writing creatively, some of my first stories revolved around a husband and wife raising a family together. Not only my first stories... my stories for a long time reflected that (and still do to an extent).
I dreamt about it for a long time. But at one point, someone pointed out to me that I was spending so much time thinking about the future, that I wasn't resting in the here and now. I was making an idol out of this dream life. No, I didn't dream the stereotypical white picket fence with roses lining or whatever it is, but I did dream of holding babies and being the mommy. I spent so much time thinking about the future, I was not enjoying the present. I wasn't enjoying being single.
This morning, Bruxy mentioned that several married couples he has counseled have said that they wished they were single again, without the responsibilities of running a household. Hey, I wish I could go back to being a kid, when I didn't need to worry about stuff and could just run around outside, go play in the creek, pretend I was fighting dragons or whatever. They say the grass always seems greener on the other side. For some, marriage looks more idyll than singleness. And for those who are married, the reminder of singleness makes them long for days long ago. Those who are old wish they were young, and children dream of being adults.
Stop! We must stop this! We must stop dreaming in the future or reliving the past. The present is here, now, and it is a GIFT! We say "singleness is a gift," but for some reason we belittle singleness, pointing towards marriage as the end. So for those who are single, be single! For those who are married, be married! Enjoy where you are right now because you'll never be in that same place ever again.
The following is an entry from my journal, March 30, 2011, as I was learning about contentment and giving up dreams. I hope the words teach you something in your own journey.
"How shall I go on? I must go on in patience, in contentment with the present. For the present is a gift, and I should not waste it by continually hoping for the future. I must learn to live day by day, so I do not waste myself by pining for my dreams."
And another from June 15 of the same year:
"Long ago, the Lord gave a girl a dream. She accepted it as any other - with joy and fervor and thanksgiving. She cherished the dream, holding it close and praying the Lord would bring it to fruition.
But then, once the girl had fallen in love with the dream, the Lord asked for it back. Didn't he give her this dream so it would come to fruition? But then the Lord asked if she trusted him. How could she deny it? So, heart breaking and tears flowing, she gave it back. It hurt, so much, but once she had come to terms with it, she found incredible freedom.
What became of the dream? She still remembered it, still hoped for it, but she did not allow it to take control. She will not, not with the Lord of Lights as her guide."
I guess the point I'm really trying to encourage is contentment. "I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" (Philippians 4:12). Whether I am single or married. "But godliness with contentment is great gain..." (1 Timothy 6:6).
Shalom.
On to the content. One of the last things he talked about in the chapel today was how marriage and singlehood are GIFTS. As a single, college-aged Christian girl, I admit that it is difficult sometimes to walk around campus, when the cherry trees are in bloom, waving their wispy pink branches all around and causing a flower-storm, and see the various couples walking hand-in-hand. One of my close friends just started dating a guy she's known for a couple months, and it's cute to see them together (all the time...) and hold hands. Add to that the infamous "Ring by Spring!" mantra that is repeated time and time again (jokingly, of course), and sometimes there is a little longing for someone of the opposite gender to come alongside you in your life journey.
That's not altogether a bad thing. God made us, as humans, to desire relationships, and to desire relationships with the opposite sex. Genesis 1:26-28 acknowledges this. We are made male and female in God's image. We can learn something from each other. And together, we reflect the image of God. Other things go along with that, like marriage and increasing in number, but we are made to be in relationship. The problem is when you make an idol of it.
When I was little, I spent an infinite amount of hours playing with my Duplos, Poly Pockets, Barbies (don't judge me - you know you played with them too, even if it was just popping their heads off), and who knows what else, pretending that I was the girl and that I was married and having children. Don't believe me, ask my sister. When I started writing creatively, some of my first stories revolved around a husband and wife raising a family together. Not only my first stories... my stories for a long time reflected that (and still do to an extent).
I dreamt about it for a long time. But at one point, someone pointed out to me that I was spending so much time thinking about the future, that I wasn't resting in the here and now. I was making an idol out of this dream life. No, I didn't dream the stereotypical white picket fence with roses lining or whatever it is, but I did dream of holding babies and being the mommy. I spent so much time thinking about the future, I was not enjoying the present. I wasn't enjoying being single.
This morning, Bruxy mentioned that several married couples he has counseled have said that they wished they were single again, without the responsibilities of running a household. Hey, I wish I could go back to being a kid, when I didn't need to worry about stuff and could just run around outside, go play in the creek, pretend I was fighting dragons or whatever. They say the grass always seems greener on the other side. For some, marriage looks more idyll than singleness. And for those who are married, the reminder of singleness makes them long for days long ago. Those who are old wish they were young, and children dream of being adults.
Stop! We must stop this! We must stop dreaming in the future or reliving the past. The present is here, now, and it is a GIFT! We say "singleness is a gift," but for some reason we belittle singleness, pointing towards marriage as the end. So for those who are single, be single! For those who are married, be married! Enjoy where you are right now because you'll never be in that same place ever again.
The following is an entry from my journal, March 30, 2011, as I was learning about contentment and giving up dreams. I hope the words teach you something in your own journey.
"How shall I go on? I must go on in patience, in contentment with the present. For the present is a gift, and I should not waste it by continually hoping for the future. I must learn to live day by day, so I do not waste myself by pining for my dreams."
And another from June 15 of the same year:
"Long ago, the Lord gave a girl a dream. She accepted it as any other - with joy and fervor and thanksgiving. She cherished the dream, holding it close and praying the Lord would bring it to fruition.
But then, once the girl had fallen in love with the dream, the Lord asked for it back. Didn't he give her this dream so it would come to fruition? But then the Lord asked if she trusted him. How could she deny it? So, heart breaking and tears flowing, she gave it back. It hurt, so much, but once she had come to terms with it, she found incredible freedom.
What became of the dream? She still remembered it, still hoped for it, but she did not allow it to take control. She will not, not with the Lord of Lights as her guide."
I guess the point I'm really trying to encourage is contentment. "I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" (Philippians 4:12). Whether I am single or married. "But godliness with contentment is great gain..." (1 Timothy 6:6).
Shalom.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Passover for the Believer
I'm not sure who knows about Passover, so I'm going to explain why it means so much to me.
Passover is a Jewish holiday that celebrates when Elohim (God) brought the Israelites (then the Hebrews) out of Egypt after 430 years in slavery. It is a feast that commemorates it, including reading the whole story aloud.
Elohim brought ten plagues upon the Egyptians: water to blood, frogs, gnats (I've heard lice), flies, livestock, boils, hail, locusts, darkness, and lastly the FIRSTBORN. This was the firstborn of every living creature "from the firstborn of the Pharaoh who sits on his throne, even to the firstborn of the slave girl who is behind the millstones; all the firstborn of the cattle as well." (Ex 11:5)
Elohim gave specific instructions to the Hebrews about what they were to do for His Passover. On the tenth day of that month, they were to take a year-old male lamb, without blemish, and keep it until the fourteenth day, when the Hebrews were to slaughter the lamb at twilight. They were to take some of the blood and put it on the two door frames and the lintel of the houses. They were to eat the flesh that same night, with unleavened bread and bitter herbs. They were to eat with their loins girded, sandals on their feet, and their staffs in their hands. The bread had to be unleavened because they didn't have time for the bread to rise. As soon as Elohim struck Egypt, the Hebrews were to leave.
"The blood shall be a sign for you on the houses where you live; and when I see the blood I will pass over you, and no plague will befall you to destroy you when I strike the land of Egypt." (Ex 12:13)
After Elohim gave the commands for the first Passover, he gave instructions for later celebrating the "Feast of Unleavened Bread" when the Israelites were to remove the leaven--the chametz--from their homes. Unleavened bread is called matzah.
Now why am I, a Christian, celebrating Passover, which is traditionally a Jewish holiday?
There is so much in Passover that relates to how God's wrath passed over our hearts.
Matthew 16:6: "And Yeshua (Jesus) said to them, "Watch out and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducees."
1 Corinthians 5:6-8 Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough? Clean out the old leaven so that you may be a new lump, just as you are in fact unleavened. For Christ our Passover [lamb] also has been sacrificed. Therefore let us celebrate the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.
As found in 1 Corinthians (I'm using NASB, but the reference to the Passover lamb comes from NIV), Yeshua (Jesus) is our Passover lamb. He came among us, long enough for us to make ties with, and then he was slaughtered. His blood was put on the doorposts of our hearts so that the Lord might pass over us and grant us mercy.
Now, another parallel. Three years ago, I had my first opportunity to go to a Messianic Seder. (This year marks my fourth year of participating). It was fantastic. In 2010, the Seder was in perfect timing with Resurrection Day. Tomorrow I go to celebrate this year's Seder. Getting off topic however. There was one thing done with the matzah (specifically the Afikomen) my first year that I will never forget, and now pass on (haha) to you.
On a plate are three pieces of matzah (see picture above. :)). The Papa takes the middle piece of matzah, called the afikomen (dessert), breaks it in half, and wraps one in a napkin. The Seder I went to had the Papa hide one of the broken parts of the afikomen for the children to find later. Other Seders may have the children hiding it. In any case, I will use the example of the Papa hiding the afikomen away for the children to find later.
Look closely at the matzah in the picture. If you can't see it clearly enough, leave a comment, and I'll take a better picture for you. It is unleavened. It has holes in it. It has dark blotches. It has stripes.
Yeshua was pierced. He was striped. He was bruised. The FATHER broke him and hid him in a linen shroud (in the tomb). Later, those with childlike faith found him. But best of all, Yeshua had no leaven--sin--in him.
Aren't these parallels beautiful? This is why I celebrate Passover--because the similarities between the Passover lamb slaughtered in Egypt and our Passover Lamb slaughtered on the cross are too true to ignore.
Be blessed during this time of both mourning and celebration.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Rather Exciting Happenings
There has been so much going on this week that I can't believe it is only Wednesday. Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up. ;) Sunday, my dad and step-mom visited me at school unexpectedly, so I got to see them and eat non-cafeteria food. *grins* On Monday, I mailed my application to the school in Jerusalem and got back my last anatomy and physiology exam (I did really well!) and got the last bit of my clinical packet in the mail. Tuesday, I ... hm. What happened Tuesday? Ah, yes, I faxed information about course enrollment to my community college for the summer. Today was a big day. I turned in my clinical packet, declared a minor (in adventure ed) and got my passport. *whew* And that's just the stuff going on with school.
In my Bible readings, I am nearly finished with reading the Bible in a year. I started mid-June, and all I have left to read are minor prophets, so I'm keeping up with my pattern of reading a chapter or two from the Torah or histories, something from the prophets, and something from the New Testament. Of course, now I'm rereading Exodus and John, but I like both of those books. Besides, Passover starts tomorrow night!
One of the things I've been learning about is discipleship and mentoring. For the past six years or so, I have been mentored by several wonderful ladies. They have really helped me in figuring out life. I think I'll always love having someone to turn to ask about various happenings with life, but recently God has made it clear that it is time for me to take another step in my journey. It really feels like He has been bringing other girls into my life for me to mentor, teach, and learn from. New perspectives, right? That's really been a blessing.
I know this was a weird post, but I have been planning two new posts - one on Dad and my Grand Canyon trip last spring, and one on Passover. Look for them soon! (and if they're not up soon, leave a comment telling me to hurry it up!)
Shalom.
In my Bible readings, I am nearly finished with reading the Bible in a year. I started mid-June, and all I have left to read are minor prophets, so I'm keeping up with my pattern of reading a chapter or two from the Torah or histories, something from the prophets, and something from the New Testament. Of course, now I'm rereading Exodus and John, but I like both of those books. Besides, Passover starts tomorrow night!
One of the things I've been learning about is discipleship and mentoring. For the past six years or so, I have been mentored by several wonderful ladies. They have really helped me in figuring out life. I think I'll always love having someone to turn to ask about various happenings with life, but recently God has made it clear that it is time for me to take another step in my journey. It really feels like He has been bringing other girls into my life for me to mentor, teach, and learn from. New perspectives, right? That's really been a blessing.
I know this was a weird post, but I have been planning two new posts - one on Dad and my Grand Canyon trip last spring, and one on Passover. Look for them soon! (and if they're not up soon, leave a comment telling me to hurry it up!)
Shalom.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Journals in Israel
So, here I am, more than halfway through my second semester of college, and already I have worked my way through most of a large pile of paperwork. I have been preparing for two things in the next year. One, I will be starting nursing clinicals next spring. Two, I will be studying abroad in the fall.
Both are really exciting to me. Of course, now that I am more than halfway finished with the paperwork involved, I have more room to be excited. But I am especially excited for studying abroad, courtesy of the orientation meetings required.
Tonight's orientation session was focused around growing in our faith while studying abroad. They wanted us to think about what the dominant religious group was in our country, some lifestyle differences, new ideas or social issues, preparing for a support network and being salt and light in our country. I'm going to be studying in Jerusalem, Israel (apparently the college is on Mount Zion!). That gives me three religions, three cultures, three groups of people to identify with. Nevertheless, I am excited.
Then we had to think about practical ideas to "engage and grow our faith". Stuff like getting plugged in, not focusing on the community back home, getting involved in small groups, finding a mentor, continuing daily devotionals, and engaging the religions in the community. And journaling. O, I love journaling. Having a journal and writing in it faithfully is one of my loves. I brought most of my journals with me to college because I love going back through to look at them. Recently I finished a journal and began a new one that my sister gave to me for my birthday. :) I have also come to love writing in cursive in them. It's so pleasant and enjoyable. I love it.
Besides the point. I am recording in writing that I am going to 1) get a camera over the summer 2) start a blog specifically for my experience in Israel. I like having a place to record stuff like that (I write a lot in a personal journal, which means I don't need to write here as much to think about stuff, but for Israel I would want you all to hear about it all), and I want there to be a place for other students preparing to study abroad in Israel. I want there to be a place where people can go to step into my shoes for a few months, and see the Holy Land through my eyes. I plan on taking lots of beautiful pictures, especially of flowers (I love flowers. I took tons of pictures last year on Dad's and my trip to the Grand Canyon. (I suppose I should supply a post with details and pictures? Haha, one year later...)). I love taking pictures. It's just that I don't have a good camera... (I have my cell phone, but I hardly think that counts. I've gotten a few good pictures from my old-new phone, but others were just pixalated and terrible)
So right now the next step is getting the last piece of my application together, and sending it off. It must seem presumptuous for me to be making plans about what I'm going to do while there, before I've been accepted, but I'm pretty certain of my acceptance. It's just a matter of getting the materials in, and letting them know when my passport arrives.
Both are really exciting to me. Of course, now that I am more than halfway finished with the paperwork involved, I have more room to be excited. But I am especially excited for studying abroad, courtesy of the orientation meetings required.
Tonight's orientation session was focused around growing in our faith while studying abroad. They wanted us to think about what the dominant religious group was in our country, some lifestyle differences, new ideas or social issues, preparing for a support network and being salt and light in our country. I'm going to be studying in Jerusalem, Israel (apparently the college is on Mount Zion!). That gives me three religions, three cultures, three groups of people to identify with. Nevertheless, I am excited.
Then we had to think about practical ideas to "engage and grow our faith". Stuff like getting plugged in, not focusing on the community back home, getting involved in small groups, finding a mentor, continuing daily devotionals, and engaging the religions in the community. And journaling. O, I love journaling. Having a journal and writing in it faithfully is one of my loves. I brought most of my journals with me to college because I love going back through to look at them. Recently I finished a journal and began a new one that my sister gave to me for my birthday. :) I have also come to love writing in cursive in them. It's so pleasant and enjoyable. I love it.
Besides the point. I am recording in writing that I am going to 1) get a camera over the summer 2) start a blog specifically for my experience in Israel. I like having a place to record stuff like that (I write a lot in a personal journal, which means I don't need to write here as much to think about stuff, but for Israel I would want you all to hear about it all), and I want there to be a place for other students preparing to study abroad in Israel. I want there to be a place where people can go to step into my shoes for a few months, and see the Holy Land through my eyes. I plan on taking lots of beautiful pictures, especially of flowers (I love flowers. I took tons of pictures last year on Dad's and my trip to the Grand Canyon. (I suppose I should supply a post with details and pictures? Haha, one year later...)). I love taking pictures. It's just that I don't have a good camera... (I have my cell phone, but I hardly think that counts. I've gotten a few good pictures from my old-new phone, but others were just pixalated and terrible)
So right now the next step is getting the last piece of my application together, and sending it off. It must seem presumptuous for me to be making plans about what I'm going to do while there, before I've been accepted, but I'm pretty certain of my acceptance. It's just a matter of getting the materials in, and letting them know when my passport arrives.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Fruit Loops and the Future
In the past week and a half, I have been introduced to the joys of Craig's List. It started with a kayak. Last Tuesday I got the sudden inspiration to go kayak-shopping on Craig's List in the hopes I could find an inexpensive, good kayak and equipment. While I was struck by my failure in timing, as I did not have a mode of transportation to GET the kayak, I did find that I enjoyed perusing Craig's List.
Now my downfall.
It's a very good thing that I do not have a house or a truck, because I have seen some really cool (and random) things on Craig's List, that, if I had a place to put the things, I would probably run out and get. Here's my collection of cool things and random ones.
Sleigh Bed. I always have loved sleigh beds because they just look cool. There's one that is about $500, but I really like it. It's very pretty.
Fabric. This is a good thing, since it would end up being less expensive than Joann's.
Free stuff:
Firewood! Free firewood is excellent in winter! Too bad I don't have a fireplace to burn it...
Couches. You wouldn't believe how many couches are stated as, "You bring the truck to haul it, it's yours."
TV's. Too bad I don't watch TV that often (though I do watch movies...!)
Whirlpool tub.
Fruit Loops. O.o
While all of this is just plain silly to look at, it makes me think of the future. I think about graduating from college and finding a place to live. Some of this stuff would be really great.
In CCC, we are on the Community unit. So, yesterday, we talked about neighborhood communities and I realized that there is a huge difference between the neighborhoods of today and the neighbors of today that I see in my head.
You see, I remember what life was like when I was a kid. I remember playing with the neighborhood kids, playing baseball in the col-de-sac even though I was terrible at it. I remember gathering a group of kids to go down to play at the creek. Because of those memories, I think of being able to let my kids do the same things one day.
But neighborhoods have changed. They are no longer safe for kids to play in the street. I don't know if I would feel comfortable letting my child just run around outside as long as he was in for dinner. Perhaps that is just that I am more aware of the dangers of life, but perhaps there is some value in my fear - that life is very different now than when I grew up.
It's weird for me to say that. I'm barely an adult. But childhood seems eons ago. And, with my little life experience, the time I remember was more than half my lifetime ago. Who can forget being 7 or 8? Who can forget the joys of being 9, 10, or 11? (Adolescence pretty much started kicking in at 12). But the truth of the matter is that I am not 7 anymore, so I do not think like a 7-year-old anymore. I cannot see the world through my young, innocent eyes anymore. That does not mean I should stop looking for it. It just means we should be careful.
In the past few weeks, I have taken to thinking about things I want in the future rather than just avoiding them altogether. In this way, I can confront those things rather than letting them hang out inside of me, secretly wishing they could come out. So, with this, I think about things I want with regards to where I will live and where I raise my children. I realize that some of them are very valid things to wish for, and some of them are not. Some of them are just silly thoughts, while some are serious concerns. I weed out the unnecessary things, so that, if they do not happen, I will have already thought about it. This does not mean I do not still want them to happen. I have dreams. But I should not be crushed if the less important wishes do not happen.
Because, in the end, it does not matter if I live in the suburb I have grown up in or in the country. The community, however, does matter with regards to raising a family. It does not matter if I have a hammock in the backyard or a swing on the porch. It does matter that I am prepared to make memories, no matter where.
Other things are materialistic and silly. I can dream, sure, but I'm part of God's kingdom, and His kingdom is not materialistic. I shall have to pry some of these dreams away from my fingers in the days to come.
I hope that this blog post is not too convoluted. I tend to let my mind wander when writing, so some of this might make no sense. I just let my fingers and thoughts flow. Please bring me in line if I don't make sense. :)
This is Sarah, signing off.
Now my downfall.
It's a very good thing that I do not have a house or a truck, because I have seen some really cool (and random) things on Craig's List, that, if I had a place to put the things, I would probably run out and get. Here's my collection of cool things and random ones.
Sleigh Bed. I always have loved sleigh beds because they just look cool. There's one that is about $500, but I really like it. It's very pretty.
Fabric. This is a good thing, since it would end up being less expensive than Joann's.
Free stuff:
Firewood! Free firewood is excellent in winter! Too bad I don't have a fireplace to burn it...
Couches. You wouldn't believe how many couches are stated as, "You bring the truck to haul it, it's yours."
TV's. Too bad I don't watch TV that often (though I do watch movies...!)
Whirlpool tub.
Fruit Loops. O.o
While all of this is just plain silly to look at, it makes me think of the future. I think about graduating from college and finding a place to live. Some of this stuff would be really great.
In CCC, we are on the Community unit. So, yesterday, we talked about neighborhood communities and I realized that there is a huge difference between the neighborhoods of today and the neighbors of today that I see in my head.
You see, I remember what life was like when I was a kid. I remember playing with the neighborhood kids, playing baseball in the col-de-sac even though I was terrible at it. I remember gathering a group of kids to go down to play at the creek. Because of those memories, I think of being able to let my kids do the same things one day.
But neighborhoods have changed. They are no longer safe for kids to play in the street. I don't know if I would feel comfortable letting my child just run around outside as long as he was in for dinner. Perhaps that is just that I am more aware of the dangers of life, but perhaps there is some value in my fear - that life is very different now than when I grew up.
It's weird for me to say that. I'm barely an adult. But childhood seems eons ago. And, with my little life experience, the time I remember was more than half my lifetime ago. Who can forget being 7 or 8? Who can forget the joys of being 9, 10, or 11? (Adolescence pretty much started kicking in at 12). But the truth of the matter is that I am not 7 anymore, so I do not think like a 7-year-old anymore. I cannot see the world through my young, innocent eyes anymore. That does not mean I should stop looking for it. It just means we should be careful.
In the past few weeks, I have taken to thinking about things I want in the future rather than just avoiding them altogether. In this way, I can confront those things rather than letting them hang out inside of me, secretly wishing they could come out. So, with this, I think about things I want with regards to where I will live and where I raise my children. I realize that some of them are very valid things to wish for, and some of them are not. Some of them are just silly thoughts, while some are serious concerns. I weed out the unnecessary things, so that, if they do not happen, I will have already thought about it. This does not mean I do not still want them to happen. I have dreams. But I should not be crushed if the less important wishes do not happen.
Because, in the end, it does not matter if I live in the suburb I have grown up in or in the country. The community, however, does matter with regards to raising a family. It does not matter if I have a hammock in the backyard or a swing on the porch. It does matter that I am prepared to make memories, no matter where.
Other things are materialistic and silly. I can dream, sure, but I'm part of God's kingdom, and His kingdom is not materialistic. I shall have to pry some of these dreams away from my fingers in the days to come.
I hope that this blog post is not too convoluted. I tend to let my mind wander when writing, so some of this might make no sense. I just let my fingers and thoughts flow. Please bring me in line if I don't make sense. :)
This is Sarah, signing off.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Hello March
This is gonna be a real quick update on things in general, since I need to finish getting ready for today.
Last week, I had a plethora of tests and projects, and I've gotten grades back for many of them. Most of them are pretty good!
On Monday, I had a wonderful late-night discussion with the couple who leads the Loft team here. I'm still sorting out things from that conversation, but at least I'm not quite as confused as before. :)
As part of my morning devotions, I've been reading chapters from Eric Ludy's The Bravehearted Gospel. It's a fantastic book, and I will likely write a few posts on it in the near future.
Today is tomato soup day in the dining hall! Hehe, that might not be a big thing, but I LOVE tomato soup, and the dining hall only served it two or three times during the fall. I just hope I'll be able to keep it down...
Which leads me to a small prayer request. Yesterday I woke up with an upset stomach that has continued into today. I didn't sleep well last night because I was so uncomfortable. I've been doing my best to nibble on saltines and sip water, but they're not working as well as I would like. The small appetite I still do have is only present when I'm lying down, which makes meals a little difficult in the dining hall. By the time I get there for lunch, I think I could probably recline a little bit over some chairs since it won't be as crowded, but I'm nervous about being able to keep food down today. And due to my restless night, on top of being nauseous, I am also tired, hungry, and have a headache. It really stinks being hungry and nauseated at the same time... >_>
So I would appreciate a few prayers for health and school if you can spare them. :)
Last week, I had a plethora of tests and projects, and I've gotten grades back for many of them. Most of them are pretty good!
On Monday, I had a wonderful late-night discussion with the couple who leads the Loft team here. I'm still sorting out things from that conversation, but at least I'm not quite as confused as before. :)
As part of my morning devotions, I've been reading chapters from Eric Ludy's The Bravehearted Gospel. It's a fantastic book, and I will likely write a few posts on it in the near future.
Today is tomato soup day in the dining hall! Hehe, that might not be a big thing, but I LOVE tomato soup, and the dining hall only served it two or three times during the fall. I just hope I'll be able to keep it down...
Which leads me to a small prayer request. Yesterday I woke up with an upset stomach that has continued into today. I didn't sleep well last night because I was so uncomfortable. I've been doing my best to nibble on saltines and sip water, but they're not working as well as I would like. The small appetite I still do have is only present when I'm lying down, which makes meals a little difficult in the dining hall. By the time I get there for lunch, I think I could probably recline a little bit over some chairs since it won't be as crowded, but I'm nervous about being able to keep food down today. And due to my restless night, on top of being nauseous, I am also tired, hungry, and have a headache. It really stinks being hungry and nauseated at the same time... >_>
So I would appreciate a few prayers for health and school if you can spare them. :)
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